Kevin is our goal tending "buffalo". He manages to keep the balance even after the puck has hit him hard right in between the horns. Dominik Hasek would become jealous after seeing that.
Steve is able to shoot the puck from any position (on top, underneath, or from the side, etc.). All our other teammates are now practicing this style of shooting to try to improve their game.
Greg is our Cap. Recently he has intentionally implanted titanium knees and elbows. He hopes that our opponents will finally get the message.
Brian has learned a few choice cussing words in Russian in order to spend less time in the penalty box. This seem to be working better for himself, the referees and the team.
Brett is skating hard to be noticed by a princess who would enjoy his high human potential and wake up his presently sleeping family and multiplication instincts.
Willy always looks great in any picture. He has learned to run very fast, and has extensive practice, as he can be seen running from Immigration officers on the El Salvador and Mexican borders.
Scott is a hockey player in the third generation. He was born on the ice with an indivisible helmet integrated in his skull.  He plays every single night and even sleeps with his skates on. Recently the helmet was separated from the skull after HECC's inspectors had found many fractures on top of it.
Eugene is a recent addition to the Hooter's club. He came over in a trade with Russians for a U.S. made odd sock and a couple of rolls of hockey tape. The value of the trade has been questioned ever since. Could make the NYR team if he had another 30 pounds, an agent, a slap shot, speed, puck handling, the ability to skate or just to play hockey.
Skip is tough to skate around on the ice, he also manages to skip getting penalties. He can be seen skipping over opponents sticks in order to get the puck in the net.
Sean has an excellent shot and could score lots of goals if hitting the post counted. He would also make an excellent golf player if the money was made available to him.
Jeff  likes to skate hard on the ice. He cuts deep grooves and makes large snow piles on his journey down long and winding roads on his way to the net.